The Lord Jesus Christ has much to offer the humble heart.
In today’s world, anyone can obtain a civil divorce. However, the only divorce that the Lord Jesus Christ allows (and requires) is when a divorce certificate voids a civil-only marriage. A civil-only marriage occurs when one or both spouses are already divorced from their covenant husband or wife. If you divorce your covenant, one-flesh spouse and marry another while they still live, you have entered into a sexually immoral marriage, which is fornication. (See Matthew 19, Mark 6, Matthew 14, and 1 Corinthians 7:2).
For those who strive to enter God’s Kingdom, a true marriage can only exist between a covenant husband and a covenant wife.
A covenant marriage is the sacred bond that God Himself creates and witnesses when a man and a woman are joined according to His law (see Malachi 2:14). Under God’s law, the only requirement to enter into this covenant is that both the man and the woman are single and unmarried, with no living, covenant, one-flesh spouse. A modern term to describe this divine, one flesh, covenant marriage is exclusive. When God joins a qualified man and woman, He performs a spiritual miracle that makes them “one flesh.” Absolutely nothing on earth; no human judge, no civil law, and no divorce certificate, can dissolve this spiritual bond or erase God’s recognition of it (see Matthew 1:6). Only the physical death of a spouse renders the marriage covenant no longer applicable.
In sharp contrast, a civil-only marriage is only a legal contract created by a human government. It carries no spiritual validity in the eyes of God, if one or both parties are already bound to a living exclusive, one flesh, covenant spouse. While man’s law can easily create and dissolve a civil marriage contract through a divorce or an “annulment”, it is completely powerless to alter or undo the unbreakable spiritual bond that God establishes.
The Old Testament Witness: God’s Covenant and His Hatred of Putting Away
Long before the New Testament, God established the covenantal nature of marriage and declared His own posture toward divorce. The prophet Malachi records the Lord’s witness to the marriage bond and His direct denouncement of those who break it:
“Yet ye say, Wherefore? Because the LORD hath been witness between thee and the wife of thy youth, against whom thou hast dealt treacherously: yet is she thy companion, and the wife of thy covenant. And did not he make one? Yet had he the residue of the spirit. And wherefore one? That he might seek a godly seed. Therefore take heed to your spirit, and let none deal treacherously against the wife of his youth. For the LORD, the God of Israel, saith that he hateth putting away: for one covereth violence with his garment, saith the LORD of hosts: therefore take heed to your spirit, that ye deal not treacherously.”
Malachi 2:14-16 (KJV)
A civil divorce only voids a government civil contract; it cannot undo what God has joined together. Therefore, a civil marriage to a spouse who is not your scripturally exclusive husband or wife constitutes sexual immorality or fornication.
Because one or both parties are already “one flesh” with a living covenant spouse, God does not join a remarriage. The individuals remain bound to their living, divorced covenant spouses. Because God will not join a sinful union, a remarriage is only a civil contract. To honor the original marriage bond, which remains active until death, this subsequent civil contract must be divorced from.
You may hold a civil marriage certificate for a second, third, or fourth marriage. However, if your original “one flesh” divorced spouse is still living, your current marriage is not exclusive and is not joined by God. To join two people in this state is sin, resulting in the continuous act of adultery according to God’s Holy Law:
The difference between seeking an escape from a covenant and submitting to the Royal Law comes down to the condition of a man’s heart. In Matthew 19, when the Pharisees demanded to know why Moses allowed a certificate of divorce, Christ exposed the root cause: “Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning.”
To divorce means to place physical or legal distance between two spouses. The civil concession was written down strictly to manage human corruption; it was never God’s design. To fulfill the two greatest commandments; to love the Lord with all your heart and your neighbor as yourself; a follower of Jesus Christ must maintain a soft, broken heart that refuses to harden against a covenant partner. The Holy Spirit issues a terrifying warning against adopting the hard-hearted rebellion of the world:
“Wherefore (as the Holy Ghost saith, To day if ye will hear his voice, Harden not your hearts, as in the provocation, in the day of temptation in the wilderness: When your fathers tempted me, proved me, and saw my works forty years.”
Hebrews 3:7-9 (KJV)
Relying on a civil decree to justify a subsequent union is a direct manifestation of this wilderness rebellion. It is a stubborn refusal to hear His voice, choosing instead to harden the heart to protect personal comfort over covenant holiness.
“But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery.”
Matthew 5:32 (KJV)
“But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, makes her the victim of adultery, and anyone who marries a divorced woman commits adultery.”
Matthew 5:32 (NIV)
Application: Scriptural “fornication” or “sexual immorality” in this context means being civilly married to another person while the exclusive, God-joined spouse you originally married still lives. This illegitimate civil marriage is the only type where divorce is permitted (and required) by Jesus Christ, precisely because God never joined the union in the first place.
“What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.”
Matthew 19:6 (KJV)
Application: God is the sole Creator of the marriage He joins. When He performs the miracle of making two people “one flesh” (for which He requires that neither already have a living covenant spouse) it is applicable as long as they both shall live, A civil divorce may separate them physically, but it cannot undo the spiritual reality. The bond is unbreakable. (See the unchangeable design of marriage in Genesis 2:18-25). Only when a spouse passes away is the bond dissolved. (See Matthew 1:6, Romans 7:1-3, and 1 Corinthians 7:39).
Adam and Eve provide the perfect blueprint for marriage, the Holy and Divine institution that HE created. Adam and Eve were made one flesh and bound together by God from the very start:
“And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him. And out of the ground the LORD God formed every beast of the field, and every fowl of the air; and brought them unto Adam to see what he would call them: and whatsoever Adam called every living creature, that was the name thereof. And Adam gave names to all cattle, and to the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field; but for Adam there was not found an help meet for him. And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof; And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man. And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man. Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.”
Genesis 2:18-24 (KJV)
Any covenant marriage today is as binding and joined by God; it was not merely and ideal; it is a standard God requires when a man and woman agree to be married and are available. The Apostle Paul reinforces this commandment of Jesus Christ, detailing the depth and the importance of the one-flesh bond:
“Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing. Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word, That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish. So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church: For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones. For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh. This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church. Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.”
Ephesians 5:22-33 (KJV)
To understand the limits of a spouse’s liberty, we must look to the absolute totality of the New Testament witness. God’s word explicitly declares that the original covenantal fusion remains fully active and applicable, locking both parties into a permanent status until a physical funeral occurs:
“The wife is bound by the law as long as her husband liveth; but if her husband be dead, she is at liberty to be married to whom she will; only in the Lord.”
1 Corinthians 7:39 (KJV)
“For example, by law a married woman is bound to her husband as long as he is alive, but if her husband dies, she is released from the law that binds her to him. So then, if she has sexual relations with another man while her husband is still alive, she is called an adulteress.”
Romans 7:2-3 (NIV)
The requirement to be joined only to your own exclusive, one flesh spouse is reinforced throughout the New Testament Epistles. God’s word consistently uses this specific language of unique possession to distinguish a holy covenant from an adulterous civil union:
“Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord… Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.”
Ephesians 5:22, 24 (KJV)
“Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives;”
1 Peter 3:1 (KJV)
“For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands:”
1 Peter 3:5 (KJV)
“The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife.”
1 Corinthians 7:4 (KJV)
Application: Peter and Paul are in perfect agreement. A wife cannot be in scriptural subjection to a remarried civil husband if she is still bound by God’s law to her original husband. Likewise, according to 1 Corinthians 7:4, a spouse cannot grant physical authority of their body to a second partner when that body belongs exclusively to their living, first covenant partner. The entire New Testament model of holy marriage requires absolute, unshared ownership until death.
John the Baptist was martyred for telling King Herod that his civil marriage to Herodias was unlawful. Because she was still the covenant wife of Herod’s living brother, Philip, her civil marriage to Herod was only civil only and invalid under God’s Law:
“For Herod had laid hold on John, and bound him, and put him in prison for Herodias’ sake, his brother Philip’s wife. For John said unto him, It is not lawful for thee to have her.”
Matthew 14:3-4 (KJV)
“For Herod himself had sent forth and laid hold upon John, and bound him in prison for Herodias’ sake, his brother Philip’s wife: for he had married her. For John had said unto Herod, It is not lawful for thee to have thy brother’s wife.”
Mark 6:17-18 (KJV)
To stand blameless before the judgment seat, a covenant husband must understand that the command to love his wife is an absolute, sacrificial mandate. In 1 Corinthians 7:33, the Holy Spirit, spoken through the Apostle Paul, explicitly records that the married man “careth for the things that are of the world, how he may please his wife.” This is not a concession to worldliness; it is a direct spiritual assignment designed to level a man’s pride and match Christ’s sacrificial posture toward the Church.
Loving a wife and seeking to please her in daily life requires a husband to move past his own need for her validation, focusing instead on doing what is right to ensure she enters God’s Kingdom.
Under the Law of Christ, a husband’s leadership is defined exclusively by his willingness to suffer for her ultimate restoration. Ultimately, if a husband does not ensure his wife reaches the Kingdom, but instead caters to her flesh while compromising her eternity, he has not loved her. Such a posture would be a betrayal of his covenant assignment.
“Making the word of God of none effect through your tradition…” (Mark 7:13)
Human traditions build theological frameworks upon the shifting sand of human emotion, cultural accommodation, and/or “church consensus”. It treats the word of God as an adjustable text that must bend to relieve human distress, validate cultural norms, and excuse the hardness of human hearts. It sets up arbitrary exemptions, invents “religious” legal loopholes and puts the authority of a local church board or secular magistrate above the Lord’s absolute decree. This foundation utterly collapses, because it attempts to build a holy life upon an active, unrepentant state of fornication (porneia).
One of these modern deceptions is the misuse of the “betrothal exception” found in Matthew’s gospel. Some twist and may try to apply this Mosaic clause to avoid the hard truth of the text, completely ignoring that a Mosaic betrothal period cannot apply to those who have already entered a marriage. Jesus explicitly uses the word marries, proving He is addressing an actual civil union. If a relationship is an unlawful remarriage, it is an active state of fornication or sexual immorality. In this specific case, Jesus does not just allow a divorce; He requires it as a necessary fruit of repentance to exit the sinful marriage and honor the original covenant bond of marriage.
Another tradition of men is the belief that physical sex is somehow what seals, creates, or consummates a marriage. Scripture exposes this falsity. Marriage is not created by a human contract, nor is it bound or sealed by physical sex; it is a supernatural miracle created exclusively by God when He joins two people and makes them one flesh. Because God never performs this joining through a sexual act, human choices cannot create or dissolve what only God has the power to join. At the end of the day, trying to build a marriage on top of a relationship God calls sin will eventually fall apart. We cannot build a holy life while living in an ongoing state of unrepented fornication.
Further proof of this deception is found in Matthew 1:6, explained by the God’s law of marriage in Romans 7:1–3 and 1 Corinthians 7:39. The modern church teaches that man’s law can completely terminate a marriage and rewrite reality on a whim, but heaven keeps a perfect ledger. Scripture explicitly states that a woman is bound by God’s law to her husband only as long as he lives, and she is “free from that law” only when he dies.
Because Bathsheba’s first husband, Uriah, was alive when David initially took her, she remained bound to Uriah. Crucially, the physical act of adultery she committed with David did not break, dissolve, or terminate her marital bond with Uriah. Human sin cannot undo the supernatural work of God; the covenant remained bound by the law until Uriah’s physical death, proving that human civil changes and moral failures cannot override an active covenant. (See Romans 7:1-3)
While she truly entered a valid covenant marriage with David after Uriah died*, the Holy Spirit’s record in Matthew 1:6 stands as an unchangeable receipt. In the official genealogy of Jesus Christ, the text explicitly notes that Solomon was fathered by her who “had been the wife of Uriah.” God’s eternal record honors and remembers the history of the original covenant bond, even after a legitimate second covenant is established. Human laws and cultural accommodations cannot erase what God has recorded in heaven. At the end of the day, trying to build a marriage on top of a relationship God calls sin while a covenant spouse lives will eventually fall apart. We cannot build a holy life while living in an ongoing state of unrepented fornication.
*”Because David did that which was right in the eyes of the LORD, and turned not aside from any thing that he commanded him all the days of his life, save only in the matter of Uriah the Hittite.” 1 Kings 15:5 (KJV)
“Therefore whosoever heareth these sayings of mine, and doeth them, I will liken him unto a wise man, which built his house upon a rock…” Matthew 7:24 (KJV)
The Word of God stands as an unyielding, immutable Solid Rock that demands total submission to the objective Law of the Bond. It looks directly past human justifications, temporal legal definitions, and cultural acceptance to enforce the pure, unchanging creation decree established from the beginning: one man and one woman joined by God until physical death dissolves the applicable law (Romans 7:3). Building on this rock means rejecting the false peace of unrighteous unions (Scenario II) and accepting the weight of covenant accountability. It does not look for exits; it commands obedience, handles separation via the absolute instruction to remain unmarried or be reconciled (1 Corinthians 7:11), and stands completely unshakeable against the cultural apostasy of modern remarriage.
| Human Tradition (The Shifting Sand) | The Word of God (The Solid Rock) |
|---|---|
| “God wants me to be happy.” Prioritizing personal emotional relief and satisfaction over holiness and obedience. | The Lord promised us trials and tribulations in this life, but He said, “Be of good cheer; I have overcome the world.“ This is the narrow way and the straight gate that few will find. |
| “I found my true soulmate.” Claiming a second union is “real love” to justify erasing a first marriage as a “mistake.” | When the disciples realized the strictness of marriage, they said, “If the case of the man be so with his wife, it is not good to marry.” But Jesus replied that the ability to live in peace despite marital difficulty is given by God. If we are married, that strength has been promised to us. |
A Personal Testimony of Grace
I know these truths to be absolute because almost 25 years ago, I had to face them myself. Shortly after I married a woman who was civilly divorced from her living covenant husband, I earnestly asked the Lord how I was doing with my new wife and life.
The Lord answered my question with a single word: “Repent.”
Not sure I heard Him correctly or even understood, I asked Him a second time. He repeated the exact same word. I was too afraid to ask a third time.
For the next ten years, I remained married to this other man’s wife, spending those seasons deeply searching out why He had commanded me to repent. Finally, I asked Him directly what I must do to enter His Kingdom. In response, He opened my eyes to Matthew 5:32:
“…and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery.”
The Lord had amazing mercy on me. He gave me the spiritual sight to see my true condition and the supernatural strength to obey His Word. I repented, and I divorced her to exit that sexually immoral and unlawful marriage (fornication in the KJV).
A few years later, I met and married my true covenant wife. I am transparent: I have failed her many times, and because of my own shortcomings, she might tell you today that our relationship has felt broken. This website is written to honor her, my covenant wife, whom I have failed. Yet, regardless of my failures or the pain we have experienced, our marriage remains permanently joined by God. It is not bound by a human contract or a civil certificate, but by a divine decree: neither of us had a living covenant spouse when we pledged our mutual consent. For better or for worse, in sickness and in health, our marriage is for life, as are all covenant (no other living exclusive spouse) marriages.
To further illustrate this unchangeable reality, consider another miracle of God: the making of a son or daughter. Even if a child is conceived under less-than-ideal circumstances, that son or daughter will always be biologically yours. No human law, no emotional breakdown, and no civil court can ever undo that relationship or change that bloodline. The exact same truth applies to the man and woman whom God makes one flesh. When an eligible man and woman enter marriage of their own will, God performs a permanent spiritual miracle.
Even though my wife is currently divorcing me under civil law, I remain entirely steadfast, faithful, and standing for her. I do this because of the Lord Jesus Christ, who commanded us to love one another just as He has loved us. This is my cross to bear. Yet, because I am walking in the truth of His Word, my burden is light and my yoke is easy.
“And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.”
John 8:32 (KJV)
AMEN.
The Deception of “Temporary” Marriage
A foundational falsity of many modern churches is the belief that a covenant marriage is not necessarily for life. Human tradition has reduced a supernatural, divine union into a civil only contract; a temporary arrangement that can be completely dissolved, rewritten, or erased by human laws, church doctrine, or a divorce certificate. This deception convinces people that when human decisions declare a marriage dead, heaven updates its ledger to match man’s desires.
With a humble heart by one who seeks, Scripture clearly refutes this deception. A covenant marriage is not a human institution, and therefore human authority possesses no mechanism to dissolve it; it can only dissolve the civil recognition of it. According to God’s law of marriage outlined in Romans 7:1–3 and 1 Corinthians 7:39, a husband and wife are bound by God’s law to one another only as long as they both shall live. There is no legal loophole, no irreconcilable difference, and no civil certificate that can make two again the spiritual “one-flesh” bond that God created. Man’s law can change a person’s civil status, but it cannot alter the spiritual reality created by God.
The absolute proof that heaven keeps an unchangeable record; completely independent of human history, is found in the lineage of Jesus Christ. In Matthew 1:6, the Holy Spirit explicitly records that King David fathered Solomon by her who “had been the wife of Uriah.” Consider the depth of this reality: David had civilly married Bathsheba, they became a convenant marriage and lived together as king and queen, and raised a family. Yet decades later, when heaven writes down the official genealogy of the Messiah, God acknowledges Uriah marriage to her as her original covenant marriage. God’s eternal record honors and remembers the history of that original covenant bond. Nothing can erase what God has eternally recorded in heaven.
Furthermore, this passage exposes another massive deception: the false teaching that an act of physical adultery instantly breaks a marriage covenant. The physical adultery Bathsheba committed with David while Uriah lived was a grievous sin, but it did not, and could not, shatter the supernatural bond God had forged between her and Uriah. Human sin cannot undo the supernatural work of God; the covenant remained fully alive and binding until the exact moment of Uriah’s physical death.
While she truly entered a valid covenant marriage with David after Uriah died*, heaven’s ledger stands as a warning to all generations.
*”Because David did that which was right in the eyes of the LORD, and turned not aside from any thing that he commanded him all the days of his life, save only in the matter of Uriah the Hittite.” 1 Kings 15:5
God does not adapt His laws to match human tradition. At the end of the day, trying to build a new marriage on top of an original covenant bond that remains active until death will eventually fall apart. We cannot build a holy life while living in an ongoing state of unrepented fornication.